100 Matt Burch Facts

  Today when I was in my Business Law class, A student mentioned something about repo companies being an agent, because we were learning about agencies. All of a sudden it hit me, with today's inspiration, 100 Matt Burch Facts. If you don't know who Matt Burch is, he is the bald muscular white guy who wears the overalls on Operation Repo on TruTV.

1. Matt Burch once got into a knife fight. The Knife lost.
2. Matt Burch can slam a revolving door.
3. If you look up the definition of badass in the dictionary, the definition is Matt Burch.
4. Matt Burch finished The Neverending Story.
5. Matt Burch can watch 60 Minutes in a half hour.
6. Matt Burch is the reason that Waldo is hiding.
7. Matt Burch trained his own dog to pick up it's own poop because Matt Burch doesn't take crap from anyone.
8. Matt Burch can swim on land.
9. Matt Burch can see John Cena.
10. Matt Burch is stronger than Mark Henry.
11. Matt Burch can read Lady Gaga's Poker Face.
12. Matt Burch can throw a person all the way to the moon.
13. Someone tried to repossess Matt Burch's car once. That person was Chuck Norris and he died.
14. 10 out of 10 doctors recommend not annoying Matt Burch.
15. Matt Burch scared the black out of Michael Jackson.
16. Matt Burch once caught Missingno on Pokemon Red and didn't screw up his game.
17. Matt Burch can play cassettes on his CD player.
18. Matt Burch will repossess your car.
19. Matt Burch defied MC Hammer and touched it.
20. If you have $5 and Matt Burch has $5, Matt Burch has more money than you.
21. Matt Burch can do donuts on a unicycle.
22. Matt Burch approves this fact.
23. Matt Burch is the one who can try this at home.
24. Matt Burch can drive on the right side of the road in England and not get into an accident.
25. Matt Burch is the reason you rely on your mom to take you to school.
26. Matt Burch can hear silence.
27. Matt Burch can laugh with a straight face.
28. Matt Burch won a staring contest while blinking.
29. Matt Burch beat Atlas at arm wrestling.
30. Matt Burch can access blocked websites in China.
31. Matt Burch's tears can cure any disease. Too bad he never cries.
32. Matt Burch once ordered a whopper at McDonald's and got it.
33. Matt Burch once ordered a Big Mac at Burger King and got it.
34. Matt Burch knows where the beef is.
35. When Matt Burch goes to the airport, TSA agents grope themselves.
36. The word phobia is Latin for Matt Burch.
37. Matt Burch won American Idol using sign language.
38. The perfect bedtime story goes like this, Once upon a time, Matt Burch, The End.
39. Matt Burch can get Blackjack with one card.
40. Matt Burch won the World Series of Poker using Pokemon cards.
41. Ladies open doors for Matt Burch.
42. Matt Burch can handle the truth.
43. They say it was curiosity that killed the cat. In reality it was Matt Burch when he ran over one with a repoed car.
44. Matt Burch is the only one who can give 110%.
45. Matt Burch once won Iron Chef by simply cooking Ramen noodles.
46. Matt Burch once beat a wall at tennis.
47. Matt Burch counted to infinity twice.
48. Matt Burch convinced an Amish housewife to buy a toaster.
49. Matt Burch can speak Braille.
50. Matt Burch can speak sign language.
51. Matt Burch scared The Brave Little Toaster.
52. Matt Burch can win a game of Connect Four with 3 moves.
53. Matt Burch can pump his own gas in New Jersey.
54. Matt Burch can pump his own gas in Oregon.
55. Death once had a near Matt Burch experience.
56. Matt Burch can strangle you with a cordless phone.
57. Matt Burch can play the piano with a violin.
58. Matt Burch can drown a fish.
59. Matt Burch can play CDs on his iPod.
60. Matt Burch can unscramble an egg.
61. Matt Burch can play Sega Genesis games on a Super Nintendo.
62. Matt Burch can play PS3 games on his PS1.
63. Matt Burch once repoed General Motors.
64. Matt Burch has bigger Balls of Steel than Duke Nukem.
65. Matt Burch is bald is because hair is afraid to grow on his head.
66. Matt Burch won a Lego building contest using Mega Bloks.
67. Matt Burch can gargle peanut butter.
68. Matt Burch can win solitaire with only 18 cards.
69. Matt Burch can clap with only one hand.
70. Matt Burch is the only living person known to have deflected Chuck Norris' Roundhouse kick.
71. 71 cars were repoed by Matt Burch by the time it took you to read this fact.
72. Matt Burch has a buddy of his whose an expert on Matt Burch Facts.
73. If Matt Burch had a weakness his name would be Superman.
74. Matt Burch got an email telling him that he won $475 million in the Nigerian lottery, responded and get his check in 2 days.
75. Matt Burch once went on a wild goose chase and caught the goose.
76. Matt Burch can make a paraplegic run for his life.
77. Matt Burch can sneeze with his eyes open.
78. Matt Burch eats the core of the apple first.
79. Matt Burch once punched a man in the soul.
80. Matt Burch can kill two stones with one bird.
81. Matt Burch can delete the recycle bin.
82. Matt Burch once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now known as The Islands.
83. Matt Burch knows it wasn't Gene Snitsky's fault.
84. Matt Burch wasn't a Boy Scout. He was a Man Scout.
85. Matt Burch can buy happiness.
86. Matt Burch can never have a heart attack. His Heart knows better.
87. Matt Burch once killed a gun.
88. Matt Burch can travel around the world in 80 minutes.
89. When the fire department catches fire, the fire department calls Matt Burch.
90. The Miz isn't really awesome, Matt Burch is though.
91. Matt Burch bought something from Pets.com in 2011.
92. Matt Burch can overnight first class mail.
93. Matt Burch can sleep with his eyes open.
94. Matt Burch is a real American hero.
95. Matt Burch once called 867-5309 and reached Jenny.
96. Matt Burch can play Blu-Rays on his DVD player.
97. Matt Burch can play Region 2 DVDs on his Region 1 DVD player.
98. Matt Burch is the reason you can't get a ride to work.
99. Matt Burch can drink ipecac without throwing up.
100. Matt Burch can watch Friday Night Smackdown live on Monday night.